Saturday, February 17, 2007

The Sanctity of Marriage

Beginning on Monday, New Jersey's new law affirming gay and lesbian relationships through civil unions will begin. While gay and lesbian couples will not be allowed to call themselves married, said couples will enjoy the benefits of marriage and the legal protections afforded said union.

While most gay and lesbian folks are applauding this ruling, not everyone is entirely happy about it. While the new law gives gay and lesbian folks access to the benefits and rewards of marriage, there are some who are frustrated that not calling the unions 'marriage' is unfair. These folks contend that the law has set up a separate but equal situation that harkens back to the day when our grandparents and their lawmakers affirmed the laws of segregation and said, "What are black folks so mad about? We let them have their own drinking fountains, their own bathrooms, and their own parts of town. They should be happy we let them co-exist with us--just as long as they remember that it is us who's letting them enjoy these privileges."

The idea of separate but equal might sound good at first, like "they can have what we have" but it's actually more than that. It also implies, "They should be happy with what we've given them as well as what we allow them to have". Of course, the successes of what the gay and lesbian folks have won has only been won in the courts of law--after much fighting. And the idea is even more challenging because it admits that gay folks and our relationships are inferior to the relationships of heterosexual folks. In reality, both gay and straight folks have challenges in their relationships--and neither one is better than the other. For a humorous and interesting logic-based Top 10 list about this, go here to read it.

But I think it's a step in the right direction--although it's not the destination. The destination will be when gay and lesbian folks have equal protections under the law, in every state, in every way. There is a long road ahead of us--still, we can enjoy the benefits of this victory before taking the issue further.


Anonymous said...

Sorry but the law in every state is not the same. I am mostly certain you are not suggesting gays and lesbians get what I have to fight for now. On to examples: family health insurance is mainly cost based on tables of probability of one male, one female, kid/s birth cost, kids (to 20) equal risk. There is nothing (except it hasn't been done) to keep the tables from being complied for a gay and/or lesbian family. I personaly think it should have been done long ago. One more example - churches and the irs 501c designation on application -- fall into the gay and lesbian minset of the orginal blog post. The mindset is outside any proper construct of the law of this land. Yet this is the mindset the gays and lesbains to join with the rest of the mainstream law breakers in their misunderstanding and doing of the law.

The law of this land is: if it is lawful for you, then it is lawful for me. Be you or me--- gay, lesbian, black, white, straight, female, male, crippled, adult, or child. {excepting written age limits within the law- mostly to fill created person positions}
This foundation and corner stone of law for this nation and the world was openly laid on a fine July 4th day.
If one wishes not to use, then they can build on any sand they choose.

Bo said...

I can't say that I follow what you're saying. I can say that I am proud to live in New Jersey where yet this state is one of three that affirms what the Declaration of Indep says by including gay and lesbian folk into the believe that we deserve the pursuit of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

If, by chance, you are suggesting that gay folk will get something that you do not have based solely on our orientation, then you are right, I am not saying that. I think we all have the right to fight for health insurance and try to find a way to pay for it.

But I am glad you mention this because I do think we need some form of a nationwide healthcare system, there are too many people who cannot afford the high cost of healthcare- regardless of one's sexual orientation.