Cookies in a Cookie Jar

You should've seen me today. I was one happy camper. Remember my troubles with the bathroom ceiling and the cascading water fall that occurred at improper times while I was pondering on the porcelin? Well, the Super came over today and not only fixed the water leak but also fixed the ceiling that became damaged with the water. And, since I took the day off from work, I was home without having to schedule the time to be home, which made everything even more cool.

So, while the Super and his fix-it guys were fixing the bathroom, I decided to bake a cake. I made an incredible Apple Cake with a cream cheese frosting. (The recipe is up top.) MMmmm!! I do love to bake. While I was baking, I noticed something kind of odd. Normally while I bake, I have a dip of tobacco in (to prevent me from eating and tasting too much). However, this day I didn't have it in. As I was cooking, I began to grab a cookie from the cookie jar every once in awhile.

As the afternoon drew on, I noticed I was only taking out one or two cookies at a time while I told myself, I'll just have one or two and nothing more. The trouble is, I did that about 9 times. On my last trip, with 5 cookies left in the jar, I said to myself, "Who are you kidding, you sugar binging fat cookie eater you, just take them all, you're going to eat them eventually anyway." So, I actually listened to myself and poured a glass of cold milk and sat down and ate the rest of the cookies.

As I sit here and ponder the moral relevance to my cookie-induced indulgence, I am trying to shake off the accompanying guilt that so often follows such radical and unplanned lapses in judgment, hence my morally laced blog entry. How could I be so susceptible to those dang cookies? Me, the guy who weighs himself in the morning AND the evening to keep up the motivation to stay below my 230 weight maximum. Me, the guy who'll pass on his favorite ice creams and second portions of his favorite meatloaf concoctions. Me, the guy who has realized he's dropped 5 pant sizes due to his diligence.

I have discovered that one of the best ways for me to avoid temptation is to simply not have what is tempting around me. Normally I don't have those little nick-nacks around my apartment. The cakes and treats I bake, I usually give away within a day or two. So, why did I have the cookies in my apartment to begin with? They were on sale at the .99 cent store. And, they are amazingly good. I told myself, "I'll just eat a couple every now and then.. I can resist the temptation to scarf down the whole container."

The problem with me and temptation is that I forget very easily. I forget all about the trials and temptations that lead me to binging on my favorite snack of choice. I forget about the guilt. I forget about the weight gain.

On the positive side of the experience, I work out every day. If I gain a pound today, I can work it off tomorrow. And I do. So maybe eating an entire package of vanilla and chocolate cookies with creme filling isn't a bad thing (if I can just limit these binges to every once in awhile). See.. can you hear me rationalizing already>??! Dannnng, even when I am trying to moralize and provide a good example to resisting temptation, I am already rationalizing my way out of it.

I guess I should study this matter more. If I pick up another package of cookies and place them into my cookie jar, perhaps I'll be able to better analyze (& moralize) my cookie binging better. I'll let you know how it goes. I am off to the .99 cent store before it closes.